White Angel of Life
by CiraArana
Summary: Kagome has an experience that changes her life. Companion piece to A Truth Revealed. SessKag


A/N: The unexpected sequel to _A Truth Revealed_ - unexpected, because I had planned it very differently. But this morning, the first line crept into my mind, and as I followed it along, I realized it was the sequel to ATR.

I hope it makes sense. If not ... well, I was very ill when I wrote it. Anyway, I hope you like it. I love it.

* * *

**White Angel of Life**

I'm dying. I know I am. No one can lose that much blood and keep living.

I don't feel pain. There was pain, once, a long time ago, but now there's only numbness. And coldness. I feel cold - and tired. My sight is dimming; all I can see is shadows. I hear voices, but I don't understand what they say. Breathing gets difficult.

Someone is shouting my name. It is loud enough to understand.

Inu Yasha. He's holding me and calling me, telling me not to die. I know he is, though I can't feel his arms around me or his warmth any longer. I know he is, for he has been doing nothing else since he noticed I got hurt.

I wish I could tell him not to cry. But I'm too weak. I wish I could tell him … nothing. It will be over soon.

Curiously, I'm not sad. I feel sorry for leaving my friends behind, yes. They will grieve for me, and I don't want them to be sad. But I'm not sad for myself. But then, I don't feel much anymore.

I'm dying.

It's ironic when you think of it, of how it ended. The fight was almost over; we had almost won. But in his last throes, Naraku leashed out with his tentacles and one hit me straight through the chest.

It was a good fight. Everybody was there, and for once we fought all together. Granted, Inu Yasha and Kouga did a lot of bickering and yelling and arguing whose right it was to kill Naraku. But they did not fight with each other over it. I suppose it was their way of rallying and encouraging each other.

More amazing, though, was the fact that they did not even argue with Sesshomaru for this right. And that Sesshomaru did not try to claim it for himself.

It was a good fight, yes. We stuck together, for this one time, and we succeeded in the end. We got the jewel back, and Inu Yasha killed Naraku with an amazing, diamond-shard infused version of the Bakuryuuha. Naraku didn't stand a chance.

But he nevertheless managed to kill me. I survived all these months, all his attempts to kill me. I survived Sesshomaru's attempts to kill me. I survived everything.

But now I'm dying.

It's really ironic.

Inu Yasha is begging me to look at him. Oh, I would if I could! But I can't keep my lids from drooping. Something hard – a hand – tilts my face up – and that's when I see him. A white figure, standing motionless at a little distance, radiating an otherwordly light.

The White Angel of Death.

He has come to take my soul to heaven.

I always knew he would come upon my death; Grandpa has told me since I was a small child; and there he is. White; shining.

Beautiful.

For a moment, he reminds me of someone else and I wonder whether my dying mind has laid his image over the angel's form. But then I dismiss the thought.

I wait for him to come and take my soul, but he doesn't move. Aren't I dying? Why has he come then?

Then everything fades. The white figure is gone. So is the coldness I felt, and the weakness. So is everything.

I'm floating in a black void. There is no sound. I feel nothing. Is this it? Is this death?

Suddenly there is a blinding flash of white light and when it dims, I can see I'm not alone anymore. Someone is with me.

She is unmistakably a demoness. It shows in her high cheekbones, pale skin and pointed ears. It is even more obvious in her midnight blue hair and startling blue eyes. There are lines of pale gold from the corners of her eyes over her temples into her hair, two on each side. Markings. She's a high-class demoness, then.

She looks back at me, a faint smile on her lips. And while I look at her I realise I know her. I don't know why, but I know her. She is deeply familiar. I can almost tell what she thinks. Then it hits me.

She is I.

I am her.

"We are one."

Her voice is hoarse but musical. I shiver. One?

She smiles at me, showing her fangs.

"One."

I don't understand. I'm not a demoness. I am – was – human.

She comes closer. Her eyes are glowing.

"We are one, you and I. Miko and demoness. Always one, but separated."

I understand even less. Miko and demoness. This is impossible.

She takes my hand. I can feel her superhuman strength, but she holds my hand very gently. Her hand is warm; mine is cool.

"Not impossible. You know that."

I wonder whether she is talking about the shikon no tama.

She smiles again.

"Yes. The shikon no tama. Though I always thought it ridiculous to talk of it as a jewel of i four /i souls. It never was. There were two souls in the beginning. Then there was one. Yours. Mine."

I stare at her. This can't be! My soul? Inside the jewel? But it was Midoriko's and the demon's souls! And I'm the reincarnation of Kikyo!

She shakes her head ever so slightly.

"You are not. Yes, the soul that once was Kikyo was reborn in your body. But you are not her reincarnation. Don't you know? You are much more than that."

The reincarnation of the shikon no tama, then?

"No reincarnation. A new soul, combined out of others."

But that's impossible!

She sighs.

"No. Everything changes. Nothing remains static. Not even souls. They can merge. They can split. You know that."

I nod. Yes, I know that. Still, the shikon no tama my soul?

"Yes. Oh, it was once the combination of a miko's and a demon's soul."

I remember Sango-chan's story. Neither dead nor alive, and always fighting.

"Always fighting, yes. Until Kikyo took the jewel to hell with her. On crossing the border between this world and the next something happened. We became one, the miko and the demon. One. A new soul."

She gazes unblinkingly at me.

"A new soul, trapped in hell. A soul that was old, but had never lived. Never lived, and never died. Hell was no place for you – me. We had to leave. But Kikyo had brought us to hell, and her soul was now connected to ours. We could not leave without her. So, part of your soul was Kikyo's soul when you were born."

I still don't understand. If the shikon was my soul, why was it still a jewel? Why could it be shattered and not affect me? I look at her questioningly.

She sighs sadly.

"We were one, but separated. Separated by Kikyo's soul. She was reborn as a human, as a miko. Our soul was human and demonic. A demonic soul can't live in a miko's body. We were separated. The jewel still existed because the soul had not fully merged with the body. It's shattering was nothing to you because the soul was part of you. The jewel was … a symbol. It was the soul that was inside of you."

I think about it. It sounds strange. Paradox. But I understand what she wants to say.

She nods and smiles.

But what happens now? I am dead.

"The miko is dead."

I blink and suddenly I see my body. We are hovering above it and look down on it. It's bloodied and torn and dirty and still clad in the white-green school uniform.

I look back at her. I don't understand. The miko is dead? Wasn't I the miko?

She tilts her head.

"You were the miko. She is dead. Not you."

She smiles and comes closer. Her gaze is hypnotic. I stare into her eyes as they become larger and larger, filling my whole vision. Then there is a sudden glow of blue light and I blink.

She is gone – she is inside of me – I am her. She is me. We are one.

I blink again.

My body feels strange. Different.

I sit up, open my eyes. My sight is changed. Forms are sharper, clearer. Suddenly _life _crashes down on me in a wave. I see, hear, feel, smell, taste! Sharper, deeper, far more intense than before.

Voices cry with joy. Forms appear in front and next to me. I know them. They were part of another life.

I am alive.

The miko is dead, but i _I_ /i am alive.

I get to me feet, slowly, and look around. The friends of my former life stare at me in horror. I frown. Am I that changed?

A glance down at my hands confirms it. Talons. And tendrils of midnight blue hair fall over my shoulder.

I see.

Then I feel him and I turn my head to look at Sesshomaru. My eyes fall on Tensaiga in his hand.

I see.

I look up into his eyes and finally I _understand_.

I understand the searching look that used to be in his eyes. He knew the soul that was inside of me. I understand the odd feeling that used to flutter in my heart, and drew me to him. My soul knew him and loved him. I understand he saw the demoness in me, and that everything he did was for this self he knew I could become.

I understand. Kikyo's soul is dead. So is my humanity. The "miko". My soul is now no longer separated. It is complete and alive, and I am finally what I was always meant to be.

He sheathes his sword and holds out his hand to me. I smile at him and as his fingers close around mine my newfound powers flare up. I tilt my head back and scream on both the mental and physical plane that I am alive.

I am alive. I am free, finally free. Free from Kikyo. Free from all restraints.

Free. Free to live as I want. Free to love whom I want.

I look at Sesshomaru, look into his eyes, and what I see in these golden depths tells me everything I need to know.

My White Angel of Death.

I step closer to him, and though I am still smaller than him I don't have to crane my neck any longer. I smile at him, and then our lips meet.

My White Angel of Life.


End file.
